Trust is very fragile. Is it broken once it can never fully be repaired.
Now what if you happen to experience that you cannot even trust your own family? You know they talk shit behind your back and even the one person you chose to trust in the end turns out to be untrustworthy. I can sing you a song about it as we say in German – several songs. I just saw better yet felt where this leads to. It breaks you apart. It makes you feel miserable. It makes you mistrust many people perhaps all people around you – sometimes more, sometimes less. You constantly question if it was right you told this person something personal. Even after months or years you question if it was the right person you trusted with your deepest emotions and secrets.
If you cannot trust your own family, how will you ever be able to trust the world around you? How will you be able to find trust in your life? I know I sound quite pessimistic right now because I am hurt. I am asking these questions because I want to make it better for my little one, for my own little family. I want them to be able to trust me. I want to find trust to save myself, my marriage, my sanity. It hinders you to move on in your life, to try new things, new ways.
I know I will find trust again, slowly but surely. I want to find it again. I want to find trust in myself and the people I love. Please, let me find it sooner rather than later.